People arguing will always catch your attention; especially work colleagues that argue in front of others (and dare I say in front of clients).
Some may find this entertaining; yet it leaves me wondering where respect really comes into play. Particularly when the two who are fighting are from different generations, who come from completely different backgrounds with a different set of experiences.
Each one of them fighting for their right to be heard and demanding respect from the other. The reality is that this is just another norm within our society today.
Although I’m sure many can recall a time when age earned you some measure of respect. Respect your elders – this was something taught to many of us as youngsters. The older you were, the more respected you would be.
How drastically things have changed around us, with every single person simply being another person.
So how exactly does this work in a society that has “equalized” everyone? Sadly, it seems that one’s title, bank balance or status is what earns you more respect in today’s world.
The answer would be different for everyone, ultimately coming down to the values you were raised with and what you choose to believe.
Respect is and should be linked to maturity
I have come across older people and CEO’s who have used their position to treat others with contempt, believing they have the right to do and say what they please – even at the cost of breaking down someone’s value.
While seemly unimportant men and woman have gone out of their way to treat those around them with love, care and dignity – adding value to their lives.
“Respect is earned” carries truth and value.
While some would demand respect from those around them, it is extremely difficult to do so when that person is acting, well… like a child.
When a child throws a tantrum, it can be pretty annoying and at times embarrassing but expected given their level of maturity as an individual. They are still discovering ways to express themselves in a situation and should be taught the appropriate response.
But when someone older or someone in a ‘position’ reacts in the exact same way, respect is quickly lost.
People respect those who show maturity when confronted with a dilemma and act in a way that demonstrates how to get through it without losing themselves in the moment.
While lashing out or threatening people might seem to get you what you believe you deserve, that respect is shallow. Behind your back, those same people won’t give you the time of day in your darkest hour.
I ask you this: is it better to be feared or respected? Think about that carefully before answering.
It’s respect that will cause others to go out of their way for you, especially when they see a quality in you that they want and admire.
This works on both ends of the spectrum – whether young or old, rich or poor, employer or employee.
Respect is all about setting a standard
It is all about learning from and looking at examples set.
People are constantly hoping to better themselves. They do this by comparing their lives to those around them. If your life looks better than theirs, you’ve automatically earned their admiration.
It’s why the wealthy seem to get instant recognition even before opening their mouths; people want to know how they can end up in that position. Of course, the minute some of them open their mouths is when that recognition is also lost.
If you desire respect, perhaps first look at the example/standard you are setting. This is something we should constantly be looking at in our own lives.
A good example has respect following it wherever it goes.
When a younger person chooses to show the necessary respect towards an older person, respect is often returned. However, if the older person acts immaturely then the younger person will think twice before showing them any sort of respect.
It’s difficult for some to accept this, but life has shown us that respect is no longer linked to just a number but rather to certain qualities one wishes to possess themselves.
I leave you with this final thought.
If you wish to be respected, choose to show others that they are valued. This starts with you.