One thing many struggle with is having to watch someone else get what they wish they could have.
Let me give you some examples:
- Watching others receive praise for a job well done whilst you are rarely praised.
- Seeing others receiving help while you must soldier on alone.
- Hearing others being complimented, while wishing that someone would take the time to notice you and help boost your moral or confidence.
There are many more examples I can give but I am sure you get the point.
This is something many struggle with because to them it simply does not seem fair.
We rationalize this way because we operate with the thought that “what is fair for one person is fair for another”.
The simple truth is that life is not fair and no amount of pouting, stomping one’s foot or making a scene will change this fact. Even if you did, understand that everyone else is going to carry on with their lives while you remain stuck in the same place.
This is frustrating but unfortunately only you can do something about it. You are the one who needs to make the decision to move forward.
If your desire is to break the mold that seems to keep you captive, then start by realising that.
You can’t receive what you are unwilling to give yourself
So how does one move pass this point of perceived “fairness”?
Well, I believe the onus falls on us. If you are going to wait for things to change in your favour and for others to meet your needs, you will be waiting an awfully long time.
We live in a society today where most people have a “give me or handout” mentality. Very few are willing to do what is needed to get what they want. This is the basic consumerism and entitlement mentality of our society today.
But how can we expect others to meet our personal needs when we fail to understand and meet their needs?
The quickest way to change things is to bring about the change you desire, to create a culture you wish to experience yourself.
Our society needs to be ‘reprogrammed’, and you showing them a different way of doing things will do just that.
If our desire is to see changes being implemented, it is going to have to start with us. In time this change could become the norm.
Time and consistency bring about change
While many might argue the fact that they have tried doing this without success, the truth is that they may have only done so a handful of times.
Yet, this is the thing about bringing meaningful change, it takes time and consistency.
A couple of times here and there is not going to cut it. You are going to have to make it a lifestyle before others will catch on and make it their own.
Think about something that may have been difficult for you at first, but over a period of time became the norm.
Let’s use our compliment example:
The first time a certain person complimented you was probably a bit of a culture shock to you. You were not really expecting it and may even have blurted out a halfhearted compliment back. But as time went on and the compliments kept coming, it became a natural experience between the two of you.
Time and consistency; it is a simple principle that brings about remarkable change.
If all of us would actively strive to treat others they way that we want to be treated, we would slowly begin to see a society that understands how to make others flourish. In the end this will enrich all our lives.
You are the change you wish to see take place around you.
So, my question is this: What molds need to be broken in order to experience the change we desire?